Listening to Inner voice
As a physician, I was hard-wired for hard work, and sometimes that comes at the cost of my well-being…physical and mental. I, especially as a mom, have been known to ignore the little voices and the heart tugs and sacrifice quality time for productivity. However, when I realized that if I dropped dead today, the world would keep turning, it really shifted my priorities. My patients would find another provider, my students and residents would get taught, and what would be left are the regrets of my grieving family and friends who wished they had had more time to spend with a loved one. Morbid truth, yes, and the fact remained that I needed to listen to something other than the indoctrination that had me work when work is not called for.
I was speaking to a group of medical residents some time ago about creating balance in a system that pulls for everything except that. One of the residents, a mom, expressed her upset that she sometimes had to "break the rules" to get time with her family. I applauded that she, this early in her career, saw the importance of prioritizing her family. Yet, her point that the system is not set up for us to be anything but overwhelmed, overworked, and exhausted was completely valid. How often neglected is wellness in doctors, educators, attorneys, and (insert your profession here).
In a session with one of my coaching clients about setting boundaries at work, she reflected me that she was most liked by the staff because she "stayed as long as she needed to after her shift was over to get the work done." As we discussed what structures we could implement that would have her leave work closer to when her shift ended, she began to express her guilt and concern for "dumping" on her colleagues if she left on time. What was ironic was that in the next minute, she revealed that her other colleagues had no problem leaving their shifts on time and checking patients out to the next person coming on (especially when it was her). This state of un-resourceful guilt that we as parents and more often mothers often feel is a piece of what also keeps us from listening to and acting on our need for quiet and quality time with the ones we love.
One of the things that NLP (neurolinguistic programming) teaches us is how to listen to our inner voice (in NLP terms we call it the unconscious mind) and connect back to our bodies to access our own internal intelligence about what we need. Many times it takes a complete reset even just to begin (that is what many people come to my NLP training to do… RESET). However, even after you reset and become acquainted with that inner voice, you must retrain your brain… remap your mind to implement the skills you know, and then create the structures that support you in protecting your own mental, physical, and emotional health. That takes practice and community.
So, first, commit to listening to that inner voice. When you commit, your brain begins to ready itself for the next steps. Second, commit to a brain training process. Many times that begins with you, but you can only take it so far. Sometimes you have to shift old belief patterns and re-access your core values in order to re-map and retrain your brain. Finally invest in a supportive community.
Listen to the podcast where I talk about belief change HERE
This could be just a mentor at first, a membership or training community, a coach, or even an accountability support group. Communities help keep you accountable to your commitment and goals. Sometimes we get into lone ranger mode thinking we must do it alone, but we can only go so far alone. That's because we have our own blind spots. So find a community, a training, a coach that can give you a new perspective, help you retrain yourself and your actions, and support you through the hard moments.
The Mind ReMapping Academy is now taking new applicants for our 2023 4 in 1 NLP Training, & Coach Certification Program.
Join us for our next NLP training. Expand your listening capacity, learn trauma-informed communication, and navigate challenges with ease. Go to www.remapmymind.todayTo Schedule a free NLP Training interest Today.
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